Dont Turn Around
by SuGaRnSpIcE4222
Summary: A sister Walker hasn't seen in years dies and leaves him and Alex something very valuable... her daughter. Can this big city teen adjust to small town life in Texas, and more importantly, her new family?
1. Prologue: Her Death

**Prologue**

_If you wanna leave I won't beg you to stay_

_And if you gotta go darling_

_Maybe it's better that way_

_I'm gunna be strong_

_I'm gunna be fine_

_Don't worry about this heart of mine_

_Just walk out that door and see if I care_

_Go on and go now but…_

In times like these it's important to be strong for the ill. Without your strength they are nothing; without your strength _you_ are nothing. Lack of strength from the loved ones around you makes knowing your end is near almost unbearable to tolerate

_Don't turn around cause you're gunna see my heart breaking_

_Don't turn around; I don't want you seeing me cry_

_Just walk away_

_It's tearing me apart that you're leaving_

_I'm letting you go, but I won't let you know_

Strength is having the power to accept the things you cannot change. I've learned that if you must cry give fair warning. Turn your face and make no noise, but cry. Cry all you want, but give fair warning and turn your face. Come to terms that you will have to let go. Hide this from your loved one though, as they will need all the hope you can spare.

_I won't miss your arms around me holding me tight_

_If you ever think about me just know that I'll be alright_

_I'm gunna be strong_

_I'm gunna be fine_

_Don't worry about this heart of mine_

_I know I'll survive_

_Sure I'll make it through_

_And I'll even learn to live without you_

They say denial is a bad thing but if it helps you to cope who are they to judge? Stay in denial as long as you please; I am. Keeping up the façade of a strong human being is easier in denial. I've found it's easier to let go when in denial…. Well, sort of.

_Don't turn around cause you're gunna see my heart breaking_

_Don't turn around; I don't want you seeing me cry_

_Just walk away_

_It's tearing me apart that you're leaving_

_I'm letting you go, but I won't let you know_

Don't show your weakness, they'll give you pity. Don't take pity, you don't need it; _I_ don't need it.

_I wish I could scream out loud that I love you _

_I wish I could say to you "don't go"_

_As he walks away he feels the pain getting strong_

_People in your life, they don't know what's going on_

_Too proud to turn around; he's gone_

Or she, in this case. She's gone, but she didn't walk away. It's always a good idea to stray from family in situations where death is involved, especially the death of a mother. No matter how hard they try to reach you, continue to stray. You're not their responsibility, only their blood. They couldn't care less. Yep, keep reminding yourself that they couldn't care less and they couldn't understand. And always remember, fight like hell when they try to uproot you.

_Don't turn around cause you're gunna see my heart breaking_

_Don't turn around; I don't want you seeing me cry_

_Just walk away_

_It's tearing me apart that you're leaving_

_I'm letting you go, but I won't let you know_

Just because she's dead doesn't mean she can't see you. Try your best to hide it so she can rest in peace. It's a matter of respect here. And if you must cry, it's polite to warn the dead first. It's also polite to hide away in your room and lock the door. They'll know, and they'll try to reach you, but stay unreachable. You pain is foreign to them, and should remain that way. How could they possibly understand your feelings? It's vital to your health to finally let go now. You have no choice; she's gone, let her go but keep her in your heart. And finally, its important to always remember the quote "don't cry because she's gone; smile because she was here."

Okay, so, this is the prologue to "Don't Turn Around". Musical credits go to Don't turn Around by _Ace of a Base. _Lol, good song. The prologue is written from the point of view of Faith Lynn Walker, who is the daughter of Walker's sister, Shelley. Shelley has just passed away, if you didn't already figure that out lol. I don't usually write prologues, but I figured what the hell?


	2. Chapter 1: Nice to meet you NOT

Chapter One

As if my mother dying isn't bad enough, now I have like her entire family staying with me. This includes my Uncle Cordell Walker, Aunt Alex Cahill-Walker, their 17 year old son, Bryan, and 13 year old daughter, Emily. I'm not certain yet, but I'm pretty sure they dropped in from Mars…

When family comes to visit, it's crucial to be very clear that, under no circumstances, will you be giving up your bedroom. To do this, you must go to any lengths possible; have no fear, lay down the law. For me, I took the liberty of assigning bedrooms to people. Fortunately for me, I assigned mine to myself. Uncle Cordell and Aunt Alex and my nerd cousins got the choice of the den or Mom's bedroom. I think they might have sensed my uneasiness at them taking my mom's bedroom, because they stuck with the den. Nice move… but I still don't like them.

I walked into my bedroom and shut the door. In times of tragedy I cope with sadness by getting sick; a quality I'm not particularly fond of. Nonetheless, I'll have to go out to the kitchen for some cough syrup. It's the only way to get rid of this damn sore throat and horrid cough; the loss of my voice is something I'll have to tackle some other time. I walked out of my bedroom and into the kitchen. The den lights on, so Uncle Cordell and Aunt Alex are either still up or just preparing for bed; I wonder if they found the extra sheets and stuff in the linen closet… I'll ask in the morning. I reached for the refrigerator door. I hate the darn thing; I tried gluing it shut once when I was 7 and it's never been the same. It makes loud, funky noises whenever I open it now. I reached in and grabbed the bottle of Tylenol Cold and Flu cough syrup. If this stuff isn't the most disgusting thing in the world, I sure as hell don't know what is.

"Faith, is everything alright?"

I turned slowly to find my aunt gawking at me with a worried expression on her face. Nice Job auntie, make talk with what little voice I have left. I'm related to real brainiacs here…

"I'm fine Aunt Alex" Short and to the point; that's what I do best. "Goodnight" That should get rid of her.

WRONG! She walked up behind me and set her hand on my forehead. I hate when adults do that, as if they think they're walking thermometers. "You do seem to be a bit warm" She grabbed the cough syrup from my hand. "Here, let me give you some of this"

Good job genius, take what I was already going for. I snatched the bottle back and stepped back. "I can do it" I said bitterly. Stupid child locks; they always seem to drain what little energy I have left. I fiddled around with the cap for a bit before it finally popped off, and, without measuring, I took a gulp of cough syrup. Yuck! I reached for water but my aunt took it from me.

"You'll dilute the medicine like that"

I feel like shouting at her 'Who Cares! This stuff taste like shit anyways.', but I don't. "Thanks for the warning" Can't she take a hint?

"You really should measure that before you take it"

"Don't need to" I twist the cap back on and turn so I'm no longer facing her. "I know how much to take"

"Okay then. Well, get some sleep, you've had a long day." She walked forward to give me a hug but I backed away again. This is getting a little ridiculous. Was everyone from Texas so touchy feely?

It was at that very minute that my Uncle walked out of the den too. Great, now the party's getting started. Come on guys, I'll start the conga line. I rolled my eyes at the thought, but I don't think they noticed.

"What's going on here?" My uncle looked at my aunt and I as if something interesting had actually gone on between us. Ick; what a disgusting thought.

"Aunt Alex was just teaching me how to take cough syrup all on my own" Okay, so maybe that was a bit uncalled for but hey, I'm sick. My aunt looked a bit hurt though; all she'd really been trying to do was get close enough to make me feel like I could talk to her. I almost feel bad…

"Well umm, we'll leave you be. Call if you need anything" He nodded his head at me in a gentleman manner. Shouldn't it be the other way around, I thought. After all, it's my house. I rolled my eyes in that frustrated kind of manner and they turned to walk back into the den. Uncle Walker walked right into a poll and slammed his head against it. And this guy's supposed to a 'ranger'? Nice. Beware Texas; this is your one and only fair warning. My uncle and aunt finally made it back into the den and let the doors swing shut behind them.

I couldn't help but stare for a few minutes. What was my mom thinking when she willed me to these… aliens… Maybe that's just it, maybe she _wasn't _thinking. I wonder if it's possible to contest the will on a count of insanity. After all, my mom was ill when she made the decision, she may not have been in her right mind. Whatever, I'll have to deal with it in the morning. I'm beat and my throats starting to get that burning feeling again. I walked back into my room, shut the door behind me, put on my stereo, and changed into my sweat pants and a long shirt. Who needs pajamas when you have enormous clothes? I closed my eyes and I guess it wasn't long before I fell asleep...

"Walker" Alex leaned a bit closer into Walker.

"Yeah?" He looked down at her as best as he could, and got a deep whiff of her shampoo. God her hair smelled good.

"I'm worried about Faith. She hasn't made any attempt to connect with any of us; not even the kids." Alex had a sincere look of concern on her face.

"She'll be fine. She's just like my sister; Shelley didn't care too much to be bothered in times like these either. She'll come out of it, just give her time"

"I don't know Walker… it's not healthy"

"Alex, listen to me. It's just going to take some time. She doesn't know us too well; I should have been there more for her and her mom but I wasn't and that's my fault. She'll just have to take to us in her own time."


	3. Chapter 2: Ill

Chapter Two

I guess I must have been coughing a lot in my sleep because the next thing I know, my uncles sitting to the left of me holding my head up, while my aunt is sitting to the right of me, dripping cough syrup down my neck and body. I know I haven't had much experience with this, but isn't the medicine supposed to go _inside_ the mouth? "Ugh" I groaned and rolled over on my stomach, shoving my face into my pillow. This should keep 'em away from me for a while.

"Faith, come on, get up and take some medicine" My aunt stroked her nails gently along my back. I hate being touched so late at night, especially when I'm sick.

"Get off me please" I moved to shake her away but she stayed.

"Up and Adam" She patted me on the butt and tried to pull me up. This very well could mean death on her part. Nobody, I mean nobody, has ever patted me on the butt and lived to tell the story.

"I'm sleeping" I was completely frustrated by this point, and didn't know how much longer I could contain myself.

"Take your medicine" Geeze, she just would NOT let up!

"Take a hike" Hah! Take that auntie! I held a pillow over my head to block out the sounds, and for the most part, it worked.

"Fine, stay sick" My aunt got up and walked out of the bedroom, leaving my uncle and I alone for the first time; not one of her brightest moves. Oh, and one point on my part.

"Come on Faith, let up on her. She's doing her best, we're _all_ doing out best" He leaned in towards my face trying to see if I was paying attention or not. Ever heard of toothbrush buddy? I did all I could to keep from gagging then looked up at him.

"Goodnight" I used the coldest tone I had and gave him my mom's death ray. The expression on his face was priceless, and translated to point two on my part. I laid my head back down on the pillow and pulled the covers up over my head and watched as my uncle walked out of my room and shut the door. Shouldn't rangers and ADA's know it's _rude_ to wake the ill? I think we're going to have to enroll them in a crash course of proper etiquette.

Morning came all too quickly for me, and my bonehead cousins were crudely running around the house making obscene amounts of noise. I guess that's what I get for being related to people who were born in a barn… I stood up and changed into jeans and a t-shirt and looked in the mirror. I look exactly how I feel; like shit. I groaned and put my hair up in a pony tail, but even that didn't work. I guess in my case, nothing would. I won't complain, I have no one to impress anyways. I walked out of my bedroom and didn't see anyone. My guess is they disappeared. Wait; maybe that's a wish. Hmm... More confusion, just what I need.

My aunt and uncle appeared from the den a few minutes later. Darn, and just when I was starting to miss them. A little longer and I could have _actually_ been begging for them to come back… NOT. 'Go back in!' I wanted to shout. Leave! No luck there, either.

"You were coughing all night, Sweetheart" Yep, definitely dropped in from Mars. And who is she to be calling me _sweetheart!_ Ick!

"Yeah, people usually do that when they're sick." Hah, take that as a dose of logic buddy.

"Okay. Umm, are you running a fever?" Do I look like the type to check for fever? Why don't you check for me, after all, you _are_ the walking thermometer…

"I don't know" I replied. I couldn't find it in me to be that mean; there must be something in the water.

"Well come here" She walked towards me with her hand out. I could bite her; I could run from her, but nooo, I just _had_ to stand there. That's it; no more water for me. "You are feverish" Sure lady, only because you're hand is FREEZING. I stepped back and it took all I had to stop from running into a steaming shower.

"Okay" Again, short and sweet. Let us see if you get the point _now_.

"Open wide" My aunt was coming at me with a spoonful of more cough syrup. _Open Wide?_ No way was she winning this one. I backed away from her and the medicine on the spoon spilled pathetically on my tile floor. Hah! Point three.

"Whoops" I rolled my eyes and reached for some bread. Toast sounds good; anyone wanna pass the butter? I made some toast and started nibbling on it, when out of nowhere a spoonful of medicine shoved itself down my throat. Well, actually, it was shoved down my throat by mother hen Walker. This is getting a bit ridiculous; I wonder if they know I have a shot gun in the basement…

I coughed and my reflexes forced me to swallow the syrup. "Yuck" I spit up what was left and reached for the water. My aunt tried to grab it again. This means war.

"Don't try it" I growled. Hah; I win! She backed away from me instantly. I gulped down as much of the water as my mouth could hold and then yawned.

"Get some rest" My aunt just couldn't back off could she?

"Sure thing Ms. Know It All" I _really_ did not like her right now. All I've ever wanted was to be left alone; so why was God punishing me with the cleavers? My aunt rolled her eyes and escorted me to my bedroom and then she did the unthinkable; she _tucked_ me in. That's it, this _has_ to be a nightmare, and if not, I'll be on the first bus to San Juan, Puerto Rico in the morning.

Usually, in times of death a smile a day keeps the therapist away, Right? Well, if that doesn't work, sing in the shower, clean; do anything that seems remotely cheerful and sane. And, when all else fails, spend quality time with your family. Curl up on the couch with a magazine and pretend to be reading the stories in it. If you want to catch some shut eye, go ahead; just remember to turn the page every so often to keep up your cover. It works great for me, it should work for you.


	4. Chapter 3: Funeral Part 1

Chapter Three

I woke up to the evil sun shining bright as ever through my bedroom. Sure, I could get mad, I could even throw a fit, but I have to get up anyways. The wake is in a couple of hours and right after is the burial. Joy. I stood up and stared in the mirror for a couple of minutes. I look like Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer with my stuffy nose. My throats really starting to burn more and nothing really comes out when I try to speak. Just great; _I'm_ supposed to be giving the eulogy. Hope no one minds not being able to hear and understand it. I grabbed my black dress out of the closet and put it on. It fits better than when I first bought it; I guess I lost some weight since I've been sick. Oh well. I slipped on my mother's pearl necklace; I always loved wearing this thing, but now it seems like I love it even more.

"Faith" My aunt was already knocking on my door. Do they think I'm dumb enough to oversleep and miss my own mother's funeral? Bet not as dumb as I think they are.

"I'm awake" I snarled. Today was definitely NOT the day to mess around with me.

"Alright" Finally; it was about time she took a hint. She walked away from my door and I finished getting ready. I put on a little make up; after all, I didn't want to look like a complete disaster. People would be staring at me enough because it was _my_ mom's funeral. I don't need them thinking I'm some kind of walking disease. I walked out of my room and into the kitchen.

"Want breakfast?" My uncle looked at me with a smile on his face and a kiss the cook apron. Now, I could have turned and ran the other way, but that would take the fun out of everything. The food smelled horrible and I was going to use this to my advantage.

"That's food you're cooking? Smells more like road kill…"

"Hey! It's not that bad" He tried to argue. One thing you should know about me… never, I mean never, try to argue. I win. It's written somewhere in that big book of laws our country has.

"Smells horrid" he looked at me like he wanted to kill me. Ha-ha, I just love getting under people's skin. It's one of my best qualities.

"You're eating it" He glared at me and fixed everyone a dish, making mine the biggest. I know _just_ how to handle this situation.

"Here scout…come here boy" My little dog ran in and I put my dish on the floor beside him. It took a couple minutes, but he ate it all. Hah! Take that and shove it where the sun doesn't shine!

"Faith!" I'm not a dog. I don't come when I'm called.

"Scout wants the bill" I didn't bother excusing myself from the table, I just left. I've come to find out that relatives and I just don't mix… especially the ignorant ones.

The wake was just 30 minutes away. Cars were pulling up to take my mother's family and friends to the funeral house, and, for some reason, my aunt and uncle were under the assumption I would be riding with them. Where they got a thought like that, I couldn't tell you. I grabbed the keys to my SUV and twirled them around my finger.

"I really don't think you should be driving. Not now" My aunt gave me a worried look, one that I would of course, disregard. I really am cold hearted.

"I really don't care what you think" I slipped on my heal and walked out the front door.

"Faith, wait up" My uncle walked out after me. I hate when people walk out after me; I want to be left _alone_, is that so hard to see?

"Can't" I walked faster and got into my car. If you walk after me, I might just have to do some bodily harm. He sighed, and he walked away. Good boy.

Driving during these times may not be a wise decision. I've found grieving individuals, particularly myself, to be aggressive drivers; well, more so than usual. When people honk, feel free to honk back. And, when nothing else works, feel free to use what god gave you. The middle of my five fingers shot proudly in the air outside the window. See if that shuts you up. Ass.


	5. Chapter 4: The wake

Thanks for the reviews and sorry this is soooooo entirely late! Wow, it's actually almost been a year LOL. To be honest, I think I completely forgot I was in the middle of a story. That's not unusual for me though, as I can hardly remember breakfast and lunch from earlier this morning. Sorry it's so short, but this will just be a filler until I can fully collect my thoughts and re-decide where I'm going with this. If you're still reading, I really appreciate it, and enjoy!

I was the first to arrive at the funeral home. Dumb, dumber, and the spawns of stupidity trailed close behind though, I will admit. I parked my SUV up front, entirely in NO mood for a distant or seemingly distant walk from the car to the building.

I went in before the others, needing just a few minutes with my mother alone to gather my thoughts. In times like these, the dead can be peaceful, spiritual, and even inspirational if you look at it from some twisted point of view.

I walked over to my mother's casket, my shoulder length brown hair falling annoyingly to the side; my mother always loved my hair like that, though. Matter a factly, she loved everything about me, which in previous years seemed to bother me horribly. Now though, it all seemed to medial. A gently stroked her hand with my fingers, stifling ten minutes worth of coughing- after all, that would totally take away from the 'moment' I was sharing with my mother.

"I'm gunna miss you mom. Life's definitely not normal without your bubbly self around to twist things up." I told her. A part of me couldn't help but be mad, though. How could she do this to me? How could she die? How could she stop fighting? And, I spoke aloud now, "What the hell were you thinking leaving custody of me to Captain Crunch, Betty Crocker/Mother Teresa, and Alvin and his Chipmunk? Was I _that_ mean to you?! Now seriously mother, you couldn't have been more lucid when you were deciding this?!"

I find, in times like these, if you have any last words it's best to just get it out while you still can. The soul learns a lesson that there's no time like the present, so if you have bone to pick, pick it. After all, the bone may be 6 ft under the ground next time you see it.

I held back the vast majority of my tears (knowing full heartedly I'd forgotten to put on waterproof mascara; the dumbness must be either hereditary or contagious… I hope contagious though, or my future kids are in for a hell of a life), and let the rest of my mother's friends and family in the two big doors which separated me from peace and uproar. Let the games begin.

……….. …………… ………………. ………….. …………… …………. ………..

While people bushel through the halls of the funeral home, attempting to sign the guestbook and pay their respects to my mother, I caught sight of Captain Crunch and Betty Crocker. Thinking fast, I ducked bottom first into a chair masked with the people who surrounded it.

I find in times like these, people refuse to leave you alone. Most feel that "giving sympathy" will suddenly make the pain all better and they can then go home and find something more entertaining to do. Be aware, sympathy does NOTHING but remind a mourner of his/her loss. Be prepared to cry, but most of all deal with the frustration dealt to you by the hands of humanity. Death, after all, is something one experiences frequently in life. If lucky, you will go quick enough to escape the "my sympathies to your family" before the next death in your family. If not, may the force be with you.

My uncle and aunt sauntered gingerly up to me, standing before my seat, and looked down at me.

"How are you holding up?" Was this guy serious? Did that question ACTUALLY come out of his mouth?! How did he THINK I was holding up?! My mother just died, I'm soon to be moving in with aliens (no thanks to mom), and a whole bunch of fat people were crowding around me to tell me how sorry they were my mother croaked.

"Just peachy" I rolled my eyes sarcastically, making sure he caught my gaze, and then returned my attention on Henry, a spider whom I've grown very fond of these past few minutes.

Unfortunately, when I caught sight of Henry again, he'd already decided to take on the world one person at a time and was in the middle of being squashed by old man Jenkins. Yikes. Sorry Hen! I mean, what a way to die….

"Have you eaten?" Alex bent so she was my height and looked into my eyes. Sure I've eaten Sherlock, it's not like I've been here or anything.

"Have _you_ eaten?" How do you like stupid questions?

"That wasn't the question, please don't switch the subject"

I mocked her in a childish tone, and though she pretended to understand, it still pissed her off. Score! Laura Croft, 1; Betty Crocker, 0. I have a feeling that's the way it'll stay, too.

Standing to stretch my legs, I walked over to back room in order to try and escape some of the pandemonium of the day. I was feeling worse than I had in days; I was pale and dizzy, and through everything, I craved fresh air; I _needed_ it. I felt like if I didn't get any fresh air within, oh say, 30 seconds, I'd be sharing a grave with my mother.

So I did the only thing I knew how; ignoring the stares of my aunt and uncle, and friends of the family, I kicked off my heels and dashed out the back of the funeral home and hauled ass through the empty field that presented itself at me, sucking in as much fresh air as my lungs would allow.


End file.
